Ventilation

Can I just take a second to vent? That way I don't have to complain to those around me, well unless they read this I guess. I feel like I have been doing my best to not flat out complain lately, but right now I just need to get some stuff off my chest. Also don't bother giving advice if you feel you must comment stick to those of adoration and condolences on my "tough" life.

Our place here in Columbus is bigger BUT it has some of the weirdest kitchen cabinets, we don't even have a drawer that fits a stew pot, crockpot, cereal boxes (without being sideways) or our silverware.  It's also right on the borderline of ghetto. If you go north west the neighborhoods become nice and new and if you go south east it's the exact opposite and FAST. Our townhouse also has basically no overhead lights. Whoever came up with the bright (no pun intended) idea to have certain light switches that control outlets so you only have lamps in a room was an idiot I want to punch them in the face. The next place we go overhead lights with light switches are a must! I hate having lamps they are so annoying, and I don't want to put them on timers. 

I LOVE my children sooooo much, it literally makes me ache sometimes to think about it but DANG! The crying lately is seriously just more than I can handle. And of course I am the one who feels guilty. I have basically started leaving Macy in her bed for 20 ish minutes at a time off and on throughout the day because there is just NO pleasing her. She definitely has colic. And Davie has learned the bloody scream of death when he gets angry... Let's just say when he does it in my face and I am trying to talk to him my patience burns up almost instantly. He has also begun the whining, he has so much more longevity with his whining then I have patience.

And since I am being honest the last thing I have been irritated about is me. Whoever said acne starts and ends in your teens should die a slow painful death. The last couple of weeks have been ridiculous and it's so frustrating because there basically noting I can do about it. The other day I went to the Apple store without any makeup on and when I got there I could not believe how self conscious I felt! Let's just say I won't be doing that again for a while. 

Additionally I've been really irritated with myself for not losing baby weight too. This has been the worst so far which I guess is to be expected with a 3rd pregnancy/ baby but I was really hoping to do better. All the crying doesn't exactly help with my motivation to clean or organize the house, get ready or work out either. I don't know what it is about crying, but it just sucks the life right out of me. By the time nap time comes I just fall asleep, read or watch TV, there is no energy. Funny story, when I was younger I remember wondering why my parents always wanted us to go to bed so badly and thinking what they possibly could be doing that I couldn't be included... NOW I understand and the answer is EVERYTHING. Haha, being alone is golden, quiet is platinum.

 Lastly my hair is in the shedding stage so it's EVERYWHERE and I CANNOT control it! It drives me crazy, ugh!!!!! (all exclamation marks needed)

These are just some of the main issues I have been dealing with lately, but they make life so tough! There is a certain point at which I should be allowed to complain, otherwise my problems become denial and that's not helping anyone either. I promise to blog about my blessings and fun we have had lately next time, for now I just needed to complain and not feel guilty. The end.

You Won't Believe It

So I have made several recent blog posts and yet I still don't feel like I have told you all what has been going on around here. So now for the part you won't believe, I have officially been called as the young womens second counselor. I know shocking right? I can't lie I've been dying to be there ever since I got kicked out, I mean had to leave young womens, only now I think I can honestly say I'll be able to handle it (kind of, sorta or something like that).  Haha, also I think it's funny because I have been telling David for several weeks or possibly months now that if I got called to another primary calling I wouldn't accept it. Maybe that sounds bad but I'm seriously burned out on primary for the time being, it's the only calling I've had in the last 5 years.

 I still think the craziest part about all of it is I can remember my days in young womens vividly. I loved just about all of my leaders they taught me so much and helped me gain such a strong testimony of the gospel I don't know where I would be without their examples. Let's just say even though I'm totally excited but also a little freaked out.

In other news David and I moved our exercise bike into the living room and it's been great! I've been using while I watch our favorite TV shows for two weeks now, like Chuck :)

Oh yeah and did I mention that once again my job is NOT working out. I don't know what my deal is. Apparently getting Sundays off and an occasional Saturday is impossible here in Ohio. Also when I was hired I was told I would get 20- 25 hours a week and it would go up the longer I was there. Well now I'm working on average 16 hours a week, I never know my schedule more than a week in advance and I'm trying to juggle a church calling that requires me there every Sunday (nursery was the same way).

Some times I feel like I'm just complaining and I need to get over it but EVERY job I've had since we got here has had at least one severely down side. Dillard's made me work almost every Saturday, every other Sunday and most of all they wouldn't write a letter stating that I worked for them full time. If you are thinking "that's not so bad" just know this, that letter would have saved us David's out of state tuition for a semester ($15,000). Working at Fringe by Carrie made me crazy but most of all it made me feel like I couldn't do hair, oh yea and I was working 32 hours a week with a paycheck of $80 every two weeks (and most of the time it wasn't even that much). But she did write me the letter that saved us the second semesters out of state tuition.

Now at Smart Style I feel like I've finally gotten into my hair groove again and that is great, but I just can't handle not knowing my schedule and not getting the hours I was promised. I've been able to work with more ethnic hair lately which has been great fun! Just check out this cut and flat iron job I did.

I know what you are thinking "so shinny" and you are right

I really enjoy learning new ways of doing hair and doing different types of hair. 

 I just don't know what to do anymore. I was thinking about it all day today, or rather fretting, and by the end of my shift I had the best headache ever. Where do I draw the line? Why can't I just find a normal job? It's so frustrating! I am seriously at my wits end. I guess that is all for those subjects.