I Lied

Remember in June when I made that big old post and said that it was everything that happened in June? Well I lied. Or, if you rather, I withheld information. I wanted to put this up right after we got sealed but blogging about our sealing took MUCH longer than I had hoped.

It's true, I'm not just getting chubby. Come January 2012, David and I will be proud owners of our very own brand new baby! And we are NOT planning on finding out what it is!! 

 I imagined this whole experience much differently while I was pregnant with Colin and after. Not that this time around hasn't been fabulous, because it has. I was just really scared to tell people and I figured I would be the opposite. Last time was just so awful that all I could relate to is what I had already experienced, and this was before I was divorced or even separated. This was all being planned for about 3- 5 months later than January. That's right I said plan and I still feel like God is laughing at me a little. So when we first found out I was freaking out about school, wearing my wedding dress again and just about every thing else under the sun, it wasn't pretty. David was trying to make me feel better by hiding his excitement, haha I love that man.

 What is weird to me is I can't seem to connect myself to what is going on, I can't wrap my mind around it. I believe that the number one reason is that last time was so awful so I must have some kind of subconscious self defense mechanism keeping me from getting into it yet. Also it's difficult I think for anyone to really feel like it's actually happening to them the first time they have a baby... or second first time? something like that? I'm sure once I start looking pregnant and not just thick in the midsection or when we can actually start feeling the baby move that will help. I feel like I might have felt some movement here or there but it's never consistent enough for me to be sure. I didn't feel Colin until 20 weeks so I could still have a month to go. I must also add that the wonderful reactions and family support have definitely helped me feel a little bit better everyday.

As of right now I am 15 weeks and 3 days. Yes I am talking in the 1st picture and I'm sorry I look so tired I waited until bedtime before I remembered I wanted to take these pictures.

Another thing I am excited about is my weight! I know that sounds ironic after complaining about my midsection but it is true. I have gained 4 lbs and with Colin I didn't gain any until 20 weeks. BUT this time around I was 7 pounds lighter than I was when I started with Colin.  Which means I still don't weigh as much as I did when I started with Colin AND I am already about 40% of the way through. I still fit in all my clothes but I am starting to feel really self conscious in them. Because of the situation I was in with Colin towards the very end I felt like I gained more weight than I should have so this time around I have been extra cautious from the start. It's going well I'm pretty excited!

As far as the pregnancy itself goes we have known since mid May. We found out about a week before we left Ohio AND we were sneaky enough to not tell our parents until we had our ultrasound at 10 weeks. With Colin I was sick for almost 2 months and I threw up just about daily. This time I used Unisom and vitamin B10; I only threw up twice. One of the times being the only day I tried to see if I could live without it. It worked great! Although I really didn't like feeling tired all the time it was totally worth it. I was glad that within a month my sickness had gone away and I didn't need to take it anymore. Now for the most part I feel fine but I find myself almost instantly getting fatigued or needing a nap when 5 min before I was fine. I don't remember any fatigue with Colin once morning sickness was over. That's really all I have to say for now :)