I'll admit that aside from being busy with school, Davie, David and life another one of the reasons why I haven't been blogging too much lately is I have felt really negative. Not all the time but a couple of times a week I almost literally find myself wallowing in all of my frustrations, past and present, and something else that I hate to admit- jealousy. I have struggled a TON with jealousy over the last couple of years for countless reasons and in just about every situation and it's really quite embarrassing even to admit!
A couple of months ago I literally found myself, in the span of 15 minutes, being jealous of a friend who recently graduated from her graduate program (she has no kids) and another who had just found out she was having another baby.... wow, really Kari? To begin with I hope that shows how ridiculous I feel and how silly my jealousy can be at times because having babies and graduate school don't typically go hand in hand. And I was really bothered by both, which just gets me even more upset with myself. Haha and then all the ladies wonder why I don't do pinterest.
Not to mention the weather here about this time of year makes me so... just... bleh, claustrophobic, lazy, grumpy etc!The picture above was my house on Monday at 8 am... I had to keep the lights on all day. It's dark and cloudy almost everyday and the rare sunny days that are few and far between the sun doesn't even typically come out for the entire day either. That is one thing I have learned about myself, I can handle the cold NO problem but cold without the sun? No way! Lets just say that I am ready for Spring. Days like today and the ones that have been happening make me DESPERATELY wish I was closer to friends and family, living away from friendly faces can be so disheartening at times. So yea... that's how it's been and in attempt to not use my blog as "Negativity-ville" I have avoided it entirely, but like all of us who miss the sun when it comes back life will get better.
5 comments:
Amen to that whole thing!
Ohhh... the memories you brought back. Aye-che-wa-wa!
I have a picture in my dining room that I bought when I was feeling like you are. It's the scripture in Ecclesiastes 3:1 To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven."
That has always been a comfort to me on days like those. Times and seasons. No one ever tells you how lonely having a baby can be when the hubs is gone, or studying, and doing all this social stuff while you are stuck in a small apartment with no one to talk to. Bad weather does make it worse.
BIG HUG... so, how is that nosey meanie neighbor, you know, the baby hater? :~)
We miss your friendly face over in these parts! I totally hear you on feeling irrationally jealous of others sometimes - totally normal. I hope the sun starts shining on your pretty face soon! Miss and love you like crazy!
Amen! I totally get those jealous feelings! I think we all do. Like when people brag about their babies sleeping so well during the night, I just want to reach through the computer and smack them! Hope you start feeling better soon. Dang winter blues, we all wish the sun would just come out for good!
I know just what you mean! Those Toledo cloudy days can really get you down. I remember one time looking up and seeing a hole in the clouds and seeing at little bit of blue sky and wow, it made my day! Just keep that stiff upper lip, you can make it!!! It's times like these that are great chick flick watching times with a big bowl of popcorn and a huge blanket!
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